Reward-Based Learning, or How I Break Old Habits

Why do I cling so stubbornly to my habits? Why do I automatically fall back on my habits even in new situations, even though it would actually be better for me and for others if I behaved differently?

Short answer: Because every habit promises a reward. Something that feels pleasant, at least in the short term, or that proved useful back when the habit became established in the brain’s “default mode network.”

I recently learned that even worrying, overthinking, running through worst-case scenarios, or procrastinating are habits that each promise us their own reward. And as is so often the case with habits, they serve to protect us from (even) more unpleasant experiences or to distract us from them. Thus, worrying gives us a deceptive sense of control over a situation, even though it usually does little or nothing to prevent a disaster. Like the other habits mentioned, it often leads to even more discomfort or self-inflicted suffering.

Once we realize that a habit isn’t really helping us, how can we break it? Relying on willpower usually doesn’t work. It only has a temporary effect and doesn’t penetrate the deeply ingrained networks of the neural reward system.

A more promising approach isreward-based learning. This involves replacing an existing habit with one that promises greater benefits, effectively “hacking” our reward system. The key is that we don’t just imagine the reward for the new behavior in our minds, but also make it directly experiential whenever possible and associate it with the new habit. In this way, the new, more beneficial habit can gradually replace the old, annoying, or harmful habit in the brain’s reward system because it is experienced as more rewarding.

For example, we could replace worrying with mindful, compassionate attention and conscious action—something that also feels much better than the restlessness or anxiety resulting from the old habit.